What do Albert Einstein, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, Helen Keller and all the other successful people like them have in common? They all believed in themselves. What do Charlie Manson, Marilyn Monroe and Karen Carpenter have in common? They thought little of themselves prompting them to give up on life.
Indeed, one’s success or lack thereof can be traced to self-esteem. In essence, self-esteem is an overall assesment of one’s worth or value. It can never be said enough that one’s success can only be measured by how much he or she believes in himself or herself.
Self-esteem is not acquired by birth like talents. It is crafted by people surrounding an individual. It is ideal for self-esteem to be developed from home. People from ages one to five are made to be impressionable therefore, it is important to start making children feel special, important and respected from an early age.
Decision making skills are also cultivated from childhood. When a child does something wrong, instead of blaming him or her for the deed, it is better to ask the child what made that wrong and ask them what they could do to correct it.
This not only builds their decision-making skills, but most importantly, it makes them feel trusted and imported. The more a person feels trusted to do something ,the better he or she will aim to carry out a task in the best way that they can. The more a good trait is recognized, the more a person strives to bring this out more often.
One can test self-esteem or lack thereof by checking if he or she has one or more of the following traits:
· feelings of being unloved
. overly dependent, inability to make decisions
· extreme jealousy
· excessive worry
· fear of trying new activities (risk-taking)
· inability to describe or even understand feelings
· excessive anger
· need to over achieve
· poor school performance
· solves (rather than avoids or denies) problems
· sees mistakes as learning experiences
· ability to trust people
· takes reasonable risks
· lives life independently
· understands and is able to express feelings and emotions in positive ways
· enjoys meeting new people, making new friends
· cooperative (easy to get along with)
· accepts and give compliments
Traits listed under group one are attitudes that, according to Gillian Butler and Tony Hope, authors of “Managing your Mind”, depict a person who lacks self-esteem while characteristics listed under Group Two are those that define a person who has a healthy level of self-esteem.
Even as development of self-esteem starts from childhood, it is never too late to rectify past mistakes. The first step comes from acknowledging what you lack and t hen working on these things. There are various ways to improve self-esteem. The net provides various sites to test self-esteem such as:
Coaching to happiness.com
These tests give glimpses or snap shots of where we need to improve on in relation to self-esteem development. A thorough evaluation can also be obtained from professionals. Thorough evaluations are specifically designed tests for individuals and mostly come with recommendations for improvement.
However, it is important to remember that self-esteem tests are merely tools to help you discover what you lack 80% of the work still depends on a person’s determination to change his or her life.